AM I FALLING INTO A TRAPDOOR???

Its been awhile since I ever update my blog...busy with studies, research, assignment, and other activities. Quitted Toastmasters since I had lost my interest in it. I don't know why. but I have not being extensively studying. Felt like I am so left behind...and someone that makes me smile all the time, though I wanna run away from it, I get attracted to it even more. Is it love? Or is it crush?
Or is it just me??

I don't know why, but there is always something that comes to my mind. I felt that I am really interested in this person, but I am also doubting her. Many thoughts appear in my mind, as much as I wanna avoid. i felt hapless as much as I don't want to fall in love again. I am afraid, my feelings for her is too deep. Its too complex for me to explain...maybe I felt like ending it all...by a trigger of a gun, but I know its stupid to take my own life cos I cant solve problems.

I need focus and drive, where did it go? the more i am holding in the more i am falling in.,



AGGHHHHH...I want my simple life.

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